Where Do Old, Over Controlling, and Annoying Flight Attendants Go?

They get thrown on Regional jet flights where they are the only flight attendant on the flight and get to have complete control and exercise their god complex!!

So, first thing I am on the plane, I have Seat 1D, which means no seat in front of me on the ever so small CanadAir regional jet, but I took that seat because there would be no one sitting next to me, which is always a nice thing. So I get on and she sees where I am sitting and right away she starts out with the “you need to put that bag in the overhead compartment since you don’t have a seat to put it under in front of you”

“thank you, I know I just need to re-arrange a few things first”

and I get into the row and start to re-arrange some of the things in the bag so it will fit up there, and while I am doing so she comes over to remind me again that I need to put it up above and again I remind her that I am moving some things around so I can fit it in the overhead compartment so it willbe a few minutes”

As soon as I am done telling her that, she says “I am going to hold people from boarding to you can go down the aisle and put yout bag in an overhead compartment, I will let you keep a book with you though so you don’t have to get it once we are up in the air”

Hello?!? Did you not listen to me when I said I was re-arraigning things and would be a couple minutes? Gee, thanks, I get to keep a book? How thoughtful and nice of you!

So then, we are sitting down, I have my headphones with me and a bottle of water I had gotten, and I get scolded that I cannot put the bottle of water in the pocket in front of me because it is only meant for magazines, the safety card and the air sickness bag, and if there is any kind of major turbulence then the bottle could fly and hit someone. So I should hold into it in my hands instead.

Are you serious woman? If there is turbulence enough to shake the bottle free from the seat pocket in front of me and could go hit someone else, do you really think that I will be able to keep hold of it in the same turbulence? Personally, I am more worried about why we would be having that bad of turbulence that would cause that to happen more so than that bottle going off somewhere. My guess is that if the turbulence is that bad, the plane is probably gonna go down and crash at that point and I would rather get knocked out with a bottle of water and be unconscious instead of being conscious and watching the ground come at me really fast.

SO THEN we are up and flying… and we have not leveled off yet, but I plugged my headphones into my mindisc and put them on my head because it was about the time that they always announce we can do it (even though I usually have them on before we leave the ground), and she then scolds me that I am not allowed to use approved electronics yet on the flight and I give her the “are you serious” look and she does that little thing that your mom does with her finger that means turn it off. So I turn it off and take the headphones off my ears.


What the hell?!?!

Does anyone know if I can buy a shirt that says “I fly 6000 miles a week, leave me alone, I know what I am doing”


  1. No comments yet.
(will not be published)